When you nearly kill your husband

How about when you are peacefully sleeping and your husband wakes you up asking for his phone.

You tell him you don’t have it, but he insists before you fell asleep you put it on charge next to you.

Even though you have absolutely no recollection of this you bolt up and start looking for the phone…….

Nowhere to be found!

He is absolutely certain, after you ask numerous times, he brought it upstairs and gave it to you

So you check everywhere, strip the bed, take the duvet out of the cover incase the phone has some how maneuvered itself down the bed,  in-between the buttons and into the sheet.

No sign of it.

You get on your knees and check under every corner of the bed while he lifts it.

Meanwhile the light is now full on,  risking waking the baby.

You check drawers,  windowsills,  down the toilet,  in the bath…. Even though twenty minutes ago you were catching your zzzz’s.

While hubby stomps around the room insisting its gone,  you try to rationalise unless a pixie has come in and taken it, it would have to be in the room.

You then sit up on your phone and work out how these Tracker things work on your phone so you can locate it in the 220 square foot room you are sitting in! but neither of you can remember the f@cking email address.

You finally take the search that step further and decide to go downstairs to re -trace his steps.
imagine your suprise when you hit the bottom step and see the phone sitting on the sideboard in the hallway.

WHAT A PR!CK

The next bit?

You prepare your rant and outburst at him for being that stupid.
When you walk in the room,  show him the phone,  and before you can get your words he bellows….

‘Oh my God..
You just took that down there!!!!  You found it here and took it down there ‘

What you want to say is
‘ you f@cking dick, you woke me up,  had me looking everywhere, nearly woke the baby up and then have the gaul to not apologise, you are a total walking W@nker!!!!!!!’

But you just hand it to him,  tell him politely to f@ck off, Get into bed and leave him with the thought that he is a complete ignoramus! 

Then write a blog about it! 

Ps…..He apologised in the end 😂😂😂

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