CampBestival 2017

CampBestival 2017

Well, what an experience this was!!

On paper, this weekend was my idea of absolute hell. Six children (two babies), a tent, rain….lots of rain, mud….lots of mud and not a tiled roof in sight! Somehow, amongst the damp and filth, we dug deep into our British souls and managed to have a fantastic weekend (great friends and the Gin also helped).Due to my total lack of organisation we didnt manage to secure a motorhome this year .Instead, we opted for CB Boutique camping with a company called PodPads.

It was a six man bell tent that included a groundsheet, carpet and six campbeds with sheets.

There was enough room in our tent for our travel cot, double buggy and festival trolly.  Although, with all the paraphernalia that comes with two children under two, it was a squash in there and not much room to move around. If the weather had been better and we could have left our bits outside it would have been much roomier.

There is a fab ‘reception tent’ where they provided us with free tea and coffee facilities and you can charge your phone free of charge.

One of the best things about Boutique camping (beside avoiding divorce while trying to errect a 6 man tent) is having the car park at a reasonable distance from your tent and being a short walk from the actual festival.

Last year, at the campervan field, it felt like a Marine assult course getting us, the five kids and a buggy from the motorhome to the festival.

Thats not meant to discourage anyone, but for us, and the ages of our children, we prefered to be closer to everything.

Next year we will head for Boutique again.  I am going to start doing my research now into what we will stay in and ill post about that over the next couple of weeks.

I would be lying if i said the weather did not affect our weekend.
Although we all enjoyed ourselves, we didnt get to make the most of what Camp Bestival has to offer.

We tried to do as much as we could when the rain stopped, but there is so much to to do, we missed out on alot.

Having a couple of art-mad youngsters in our crowd, we headed to The Art Tent first.
The kids had a great time making dreamcatchers out of old vinyl records and cds.

Once the main acts started we headed over to Castle Field.

We rumaged for a spot like crazed fans to watch Justin Flethcher AKA Mr Tumble and then pitched up for my personal Camp Bestival highlight of the weekend…..Dick and Dom.  You’ve never know true exhilaration until you have screamed ‘BOGIES’ in the rain, like your eight year old self.

One thing that did help keep my spirits up while my Hunters were getting abused was The Alchemy Bar by Schweppes.

A Gin and Tonic cocktail bar where Special ingridiants mixed with the G&T’s added something a bit special to my already favourite drink.

So with a couple of bevvies inside us, we soldiered on.

We danced (in the rain) to All Saints, Mark Ronson, Madness, Louisa Johnson and the other amazing acts that made up the 2017 line up. 

The kids raved with Bflf in the Bollywood tent and threw some shapes at Sara Cox DJ set.

Now lets talk about the food…..oh the food!
Ive mentioned in previous posts about how much I love the Camp Bestival grub.

On the first night we had an obligitory crepe…one of the kids favourite things! Not cheap at £5 each, especially when you have as many mouths to feed as we do, but its becoming a tradition we cant resist.

The paad thai noodles are a huge hit with my little lot.  I can guarentee they will put away a portion each, no problem!!
And obvs, anything that does get left, Mike and I are ready and waiting to swoop in like seagulls on Brighton Pier!

The corn is another essential whilst at CB! I can guarentee, my instagram is always cluttered over CB weekend with gorgeous kiddies sinking their teeth into a golden, buttered corn on the cob in The Lower Kids Garden.

Then you have Mikes playground, The Feast Collective.
This is a tent/section of the festival dedicated to different cuisines and dishes from all over the place.  Whether you fancy fish and chips or a lamb curry, The Feast Collective will sell it.
Mainly with a street food vibe, This is where i know ill find Mike if we get split up.

We tried DJBBQ pulled pork burger, which was everything i had hoped for after salivating over his Instagram over the last few months.
We tried chips, cheese and gravy which i am convinced would make the best hangover food and was another winner with the kids .
The dish of the weekend for me had to be the Indonesian Coconut Curry and dumplings…..it was the BEST curry I have ever had!

Another great thing about Camp Bestival is that you can bring your own food and drink into the grounds.
So, as tempting as it is to just keep browsing the stalls, trying a dish ever hour, bringing your own bits will save your pennies.

The rain finally eased off on Sunday afternoon so thats when we headed to The Dingly Dell.

This is an area in the woods with a childrens park, farm animals and outdoor activities like zip wires, childrens building sites and Lizzies Way.
Now, im not going to lie, I haven’t made it to Lizzies Way.
I have been told by my other blogging friends that this is a highlight of Camp Bestival.
All i needed to hear was, in the middle of the woods, she has a mud cafe and you can make potions!!…this is enough to make sure it is our first stop on the list for next year!

Over the next couple of weeks I will publish more posts on Camp Bestival.
I will cover more about the accomodation options, what to see, saving money and travelling there etc.

For now, the purpose of my post is to say, despite the weather, Camp Bestival 2017 was brilliant weekend, making more unforgettable memories with the kids, which, afterall, is what its all about.

The tickets for 2018 have just been released and ticketline offer a paymentplan.

You can book your tickets and pay them off weekly which I have done for last two years and it works so well.

Boutique options are not available yet but if you secure your weekend tickets, they include standard camping pitches.

If I have managed to convince any of you to go, please let me know and we can keep in touch over the next few months and maybe even hook up over a G&T  in the Magic Meadow next year 😉

If you have enjoyed this post, please share it on your social media.

Love Kate x

My Mumcation

My Mumcation

Psychologists have suggested that mothers should take holidays with friends, not family – and this includes leaving the children behind. Experts are urging tired mothers to go on “mum-cations”, holidays without their offspring, to take a proper break.‘ With this in mind, me and three of my closest girlfriends booked a ‘mumcation’ to Vilamoura for a few days in October. A few people asked me if the weather was going to be any good in Portugal that time if year, as if we were crazy not to follow the blazing sun. These people had totally missed the point of a mumcation. Of corse good weather would be preferable, but honestly, if i could go to the toilet on my own, sleep without someones foot digging in my boobs and sit down by a pool without worrying who is going to drown/get abducted or piss off fellow vacationers, I would be a happy girl. This weekend was more than a girls weekend, It was therapy and It gave me a chance to really relax and unwind. When you become a mum your life revolves around these little people (rightly so), but we all need to keep our individual identity and take time out for ourselves, it is a huge factor to how I cope as a mum. Whether it is a night out with Mike, drinks with the girls or a shopping trip entirely on my own, it is my time out. It is my chance to clear my head of football training, horse riding, boxing, school pick up, kids parties, laundry, dinner etc and focus on me. The morning we left I felt a complete mixture of emotions. I have been away on my own before, but not abroad since our two youngest have been born. Let me picture the morning I left for Portugal for you….. ‘George, Arthur, come here, give me a kiss, I am going to miss you so much’ *GEORGE EMPTIES BUCKET OF LEGO ON MY BEDROOM CARPET* ‘FFS George!!! This is why i need a break’ ‘George I am sorry, come here and give me a kiss’ *ARTHUR POURS THE CONTENTS OF MY COLD COFFEE OVER MY BED* ……..’Rosie, how long are you going to be? I know the flight is in 8 hours but we dont want to risk missing it’ From the moment Rosie picked me up to when she dropped me back to my door four days later, I did not stop laughing! We talked about everything, nothing was off the table. We talked about our kids, our partners and our friends, we discussed designer vaginas, sex and how to make a Wood pigeon call with your tounge. We did eachothers make up and hair and shared eachothers clothes. We people watched and ate great food (without a high chair or childrens menu in sight!) We shared secrets and drank, we drank lots! We danced every night until the early hours and the one day the weather was bit ‘meh’ we found a great shopping mall and we shopped. I picked up a couple of treats for the kids snd a little something for me…. (do you like my new boots?) I managed to read a whole book! From start to finish, in one weekend. If you don’t have kids, this may seem ridiculous, if you do you kids, well, you know. Guess what else I did? And I haven’t done this since I was about 21….. I had an afternoon nap! A siesta if you will. Not because I had just given birth or because I dozed off breast feeding a baby, but because I consciously chose to! Another thing. I have never enjoyed a hangover so much. Knowing you can eat, drink and sleep your way through it without having to make food for little ones, read stories and change nappies makes a hangover so much easier to bear. I can only describe the weekend as Bad Moms meets The Hangover with a drizzle of bridesmaids. It was bliss…utter bliss and I owe my girls so much for being the perfect friends. Their laid back natures ment there were no tantrums, no arguments and by the time we were due to come home I felt so ready to see Mike and the kids and be ‘mum’ again. I urge you to try it! Book something up! It doesnt have to expensive, it doesnt have to be abroad. A weekend in Portugal cost us £250 each (plus spending money). Easyjet flights were £150 return from Gatwick to Faro and our apartment at The Dom Pedro Portobelo was right on the marina where all the bars and restaurants are. It comfortably accomodated the four of us and cost £100 each for the four nights. I asked some fellow mum blogger what their opinionon ‘Mumcations’ is, here is what they had to say: Rebecca at www.beccablogsitout.com I haven’t had one and I’m.not sure I could. I’d love to, in theory. I could definitely use a break. But I think I’d feel too guilty if I went away for more than a day without the twins. I think I’d miss them. Jenna at www.thentherewerethree.uk ‘I’ve had some! I met an amazing bunch of ladies on a birth group on Facebook and we arrange a couple of weekend breaks a year. We’ve booked a farmhouse in north wales, various city stays and are going to see the Spice Girls next year. I definitely think they’re needed.’ Francessca at https://frompenniestopounds.com ‘I’ve been on hen do’s and also my honeymoon without my daughter. With the honeymoon we went to Mexico which you can’t just pop over for, but I said I would not go for longer than 10 days. I missed her but she had a great time with her grandparents. I was never close to my grandparents so I’m happy for her to spend time with them. I think it’s healthy for both you and the kids. I always take my daughter away every year now though since splitting up with my ex-husband.’ Gail at www.yammymommy.co.uk ‘Still can’t do more than a night away from my 4 year old. I think we would both struggle after 24 hours!’ Victoria at www.travelvixta.com ‘I haven’t yet, but I think in a couple of years once my youngest is at school then I’d love to go on a yoga retreat by myself! They look like bliss and even now with a 6 year old and 3 year old I feel like I could really do with some time to myself and a break for a few days to a retreat!’

Maybelline Nail Varnish

Maybelline Nail Varnish

I have been on the search for a metallic rose gold nailvarnish. (This is the colour i was after) Im not sure i have found exactly what i was looking for, but it comes very close. MAYBELLINE SUPER STAY 7 DAYS, GEL NAIL COLOUR, METALLIC SILKS in Rose Veil £4.50 I love the brush and the texture of the varnish.  It leaves a lovely finish and is easy to put on neatly. It dried within five minutes and looks great! It is a lovely rose gold colour and looks fun aswell as classy. Can anyone recommend any other nail varnishes for the summer? Kate x

The Alternative Christmas Dinner

The Alternative Christmas Dinner

Every year I say I will buy a few Turkeys to rear on the farm for Christmas dinner and every October I realise I have left it too late!

So then, every October /November I spend loads of time researching the best place to buy one. Marks and Spencers? Sainsburys? The local butcher or farm shop? Then I spend my monthly mortgage payment on a premium, amazing bird to feed my fifteen guests.

Now, here is the crazy bit….every year we all have the same conversation just after Christmas… ‘I am not a lover of Turkey’ ‘It is a very dry meat’ ‘It’s tradition though..’ ‘I prefer chicken all day long’

In fact, the only thing that Turkey offers our house at Christmas, which we can not sacrifice is Turkey sandwiches in the evening (which a medium crown will suffice). I have made an executive decision and will NOT be cooking a turkey for our Christmas dinner.

We have taken a few animals to slaughter over the last few weeks so we have a freezer full of beef, lamb and pork. The cuts of meat we have would be worth a fortune if we had to buy them at a butchers.   So this year I am going to cook a Beef Wellington and a leg of lamb for our lunch.

This got me thinking about alternative Christmas Dinners and what other things families serve up for their grub.

I asked a few fellow bloggers and it seems quite a few people are not too fussed on our traditional Turkey. Here are some suggestions for something different.

Sophie:

‘We go for Ham. There is no waste and we actually enjoy it. Noone in our family really likes turkey so always a bit of a waste!’

www.sophobsessed.com

Ayse:

‘We don’t eat meat so last year I made salmon. I wasn’t too fussed about it and this year we’re just having everything but the meat!’ 

www.arepops.com

Kelly:

‘We are having the Lamb stack from Lidl, as none of us are too fond of Turkey. I will be making stuffed butternut squash for the vegetarian quest and getting a small Turkey crown for my Grandparents, as that would be dangerous grounds if I didn’t !’

Www.reducedgrub.com

Louise:

‘We’re vegetarian and my Mum has always made a mushroom strudel and we’ve carried on the tradition! With all the usual trimmings of course.’

www.pinkpearbear.com

Victoria:

‘I find turkey quite bland so we usually have lamb or salmon.’

www.thegrowingmum.com

Emma:

‘A lovely plump goose and all that tasty skin 😍😍 ‘

www.readyfreddiego.com

Jessica:

‘We are eating out at a restaurant this year so my parents have chosen to have a Chateaubriand. As they said by the time Christmas comes your normally board of turkey ! ‘

Www.beautiesandthebibs.co.uk

Lauren:

‘We are vegetarian so we normally have a mushroom wellington or nut roast 😊’

www.sophiesnursery.com

Elizabeth:

‘My partner doesn’t enjoy Turkey so always has a lamb shank for his Christmas dinner. ‘

www.whererootsandwingsentwine.com

Eva:

‘Nut roast – as I’m vegetarian Husband isn’t but it became now our family tradition at Christmas.’

www.captainbobcat.com

Stevie:

‘My stepdad is Indian, one year we had a curry!’

www.thismummaneedstea.com

Georgina:

‘Quorn family roast and spinach and feta tart is what my family had growing up! ‘

www.geegardner.co.uk

Victoria:

‘Hubby and kids will have chicken breasts (hubby’s choice), but I’m veggie so I’ll just have extra stuffing or a nut roast.  We never cook a turkey here! ‘

www.lyliarose.com

Sarah:

‘If we was in charge of Christmas dinner I imagine I would cook chicken, I can’t stand turkey but everyone seems to enjoy a nice roast chicken! ‘

www.mummycatnotes.com

Siobhan:

‘A lot of our family don’t like traditional roasts, so our tradition is to have a big Irish cooked breakfast on Xmas morning, then party food and snacky bits during the day as everyone pops in and out, then in the evening, a couple of different joints of meat in warm rolls – yum!’ www.passthewineplease.blog

Samantha:

‘We’re not really into turkey so we always have our fave roast dinner meat – a chicken! We also get a big ham or beef joint too. 😊’

www.stressymama.com

Cat:

‘We do normally have turkey but on a couple of occasions we have gone for a rib of beef instead. One of our guests this year hates turkey so I think I will cook a rib of beef again.’

www.pushingthemoon.com

Kimberly:

‘We have a ham every year as hardly any of us like turkey. This year there are lots of us so there will be a goose too ‘

www.oddhogg.com

Wendy:

‘One year I did – IKEA meatballs, sticky chipolatas, fries, loganberry jam, sautéed red cabbage and Daim bar cake – all from the IKEA food shop for less than £20  – it was everyones favourite Christmas! 🙂 ‘

www.daisiesandpie.co.uk

Kati:

‘If I make a Christmas dinner it has to be apple-stuffed duck roast! I find turkey too bland and lean and if I’m going to go all-out, I might as well make it a cardiac arrest on a plate’

www.howtorockatparenting.wordpress.com

Clare:

‘My husband hates turkey he thinks it’s too bland so we compromise with a 3 bird roast normally. We had goose one year and it was so fatty and a pain in the bum to cook we just stick to a 3 bird.  I’m not telling him your having beef Wellington though that would be his preference!!’

www.freddiesmummyuk.wordpress.com 

Michelle:

‘For a few years, we did a Mexican Xmas Day.  Sombreros, Mexican decorations, games and Mexican food/Drink obv. Easier to get food from the supermarket in the rush and loads of fun! ‘

www.seeingRainbows.co.uk

Helen:

‘We have had steak, chips & peppercorn sauce for the past 5 years and love it! So chilled out and no peeling veg! ‘

www.casacostello.com

Jo:

‘I’m a vegetarian, so we don’t have turkey 😉 I make a savoury crumble instead, with loads of veg and cheesy crumble topping, and serve it with roast potatoes. Even my meat eating husband enjoys it!’

www.cupoftoast.co.uk

Liberty:

‘We always do something different. We are half south African and it sounds crazy but last year was brilliant, the lads went out to do the meat – a side of beef stuffed and rolled in foil on the fire (BBQ or braai as we’d call it) in the middle of a UK winter. They loved it and the kids too especially afterwards when we turned it in to bonfire. We added roasted vegetables and potatoes dauphinois to the meal which we’d done in the oven. All in all very little fuss and plenty of fun. ‘

www.libertyonthelighterside.com

Lynette:

‘We will be having chicken or lamb. I haven’t had a turkey Christmas dinner for about 20 years. I don’t really like turkey and I definitely don’t trust myself to cook it well. I know it would end up like the one in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation’

www.reclusivefox.com

Charlotte:

‘One year we decided to have Christmas dinner out and I had roast pigeon! It was actually amazing and a welcomed change!’

 Www.themummytoolbox.com

Kelly:

‘We often have beef and I have a friend who lets everyone choose and so the kids pick fish fingers!’

www.thebestversionofkelly.com

Victoria:

‘We have a buffet with lots of elements from Spanish cuisine to reflect the Other Half’s heritage. ‘

www.starlightandstories.com

Sally:

‘Goose, pheasant, duck we’ve had them all as my family have never been huge turkey fans’

Www.motherand3sons.com

Natalie:

‘My cousin does turkey pasta because none of her family like a turkey roast. Sounds grim but she roasts the turkey, takes the meat off & turns it into a delicious pasta bake!’

www.crummymummy.co.uk

Sarah:

‘We’re doing a joint of beef this year.i will miss the turkey sandwiches though!’😂

www.digitalmotherhood.com

Christy:

‘This year we are having a three bird game roast – partridge, pheasant and pigeon! You may think eating pigeon is a bit weird but it’s actually a really delicate meat with a lot of flavour.’

www.welshmum.co.uk

Helen:

‘We tend to alternate, one year might be a rib of beef and a ham, other it will be a turkey. I’m not a huge fan of turkey so it’s a nice change for me. Important as I tend to be the cook!’

www.welshmumwriting.com

Rosies Coffee Lounge, Lingfield

Rosies Coffee Lounge, Lingfield

Today I found what might be one of my favourite places as a mum of a toddler and a baby! I have to share this little gem with you because I have been waiting over 10 years to find somewhere like this! Rosies Coffee Lounge in Lingfield is every parents Haven. The front of the shop is set out like a usual coffee lounge with a lovely vintage theme and on arrival you wouldn’t necessarily expect much more than a great breakfast and cup of tea. It is the back of the shop that left my speechless, I can only describe It like a mums ‘speak easy’ coffee shop. At the side of the coffee Lounge is a babygate that leads into a lovely ‘play room’ full of dressing up clothes and toy boxes. On the other side of this lovely room is a fantastic, covered, outdoor area with tables and chairs and a contained soft play area for babies and toddlers. Perfect for a rainy day, you can sit and catch up with friends or just enjoy some time indulging a coffee and slice of cake while the little ones crack on and play. Rosies offers even more to us parents on a sunny day with a gorgeous outdoor garden. Completly covered in fake grass it feels a little like being in teletubby land. They have ride on toys, benches, bouncy castle and lots more to keep the children entertained. I honestly couldnt find fault in this wonderful place. The decor is quaint, cosy and vintage which makes chilling in their garden all the more relaxing. Baby gates and fencing everywhere means there is no way of children escaping which takes the anxiety out of enjoying your cuppa. When i normally take George out for coffee with the girls i’m forever having to wrestle him into staying in a high chair, chasing him round like a lunatic before he starts stealing food from an unassuming diners plate or running out the front door. If I am lucky enough for him to sit still he is usually screaming like something out of the exorcist for a biscuit, that once I give him, he chews and spits back out 😣 The toys, grass and equipment at Rosies are spotless which I am completly in awe of as I have never found a kids space that I am happy to walk around without my shoes on. If there was a coffee themed Masterchef, my friend Rosie and I would be the Greg and John and with our vast experience I can tell you Rosies Coffee Lounge capuchinno is one of the best we’ve had. The jackets potatoes and breakfasts were great too. On top of all this, the staff were so wonderful, welcoming and patient with the children (and parents) it made the whole atmosphere even more enjoyable. Rosies also offer children’s party packages and events. Take a look at their website for more information. https://www.rosiescoffeelounge.com I should add, don’t be put off of you have no children. As I mentioned earlier, the font of the shop is a great area and when I was there, not a child in sight! It’s important, given my glowing review that you know I did not recieve anything in return for this review. In fact, I went ‘secret shopper’ style and didn’t even mention Modern Mum to them. So, if you want to find me between the hours of 9-2 this is probably where I will be plotted up with Rosie, my laptop, a copy of OK or If I’m feeling like a particularly good mum, I might even be playing with my children 😉 Let me know if you take a trip down there and what you think and tell them I said hi 🤗 Peace Out.

Do kids see race?

Do kids see race

Barack Obama tweeted recently ‘No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin or his background or his religion……’ I am starting to wonder if, as well as pure ignorance, has political correctness contributed to Racism. Obama is right, so at what age do you start noticing and worrying about racism? My ten and eight year old sons were sitting in the back of the car with a friend of theirs who is mixed race. Amongst the shouting and laughing coming from the back seat, I heard one of my sons say ‘you’re so black…..you….’ He couldn’t finish because I hit my brakes, pulled over and totally lost my head.  I started going into a rant about how I hadn’t brought him up to say things like that. Before I could finish his friend stopped me. ‘Kate, we were just roasting each other! I just said to Harri, you’re so white, you must be invisible when its snows’ I laughed! and I was so relieved. But It made me sit back and think, Am I creating issues about colour that the kids don’t even see. My kids aren’t racist, not even slightly, so why did I go so mad when I heard him say that? Because, to make reference someone’s skin colour in a negative way is racist.  But,  Is it only racist if that person takes offence? As their mum,  it’s my job to make sure they are brought knowing what is right and wrong. I remember when Charlie was at nursery, he had the most wonderful teacher, Mrs Patel.  One day she pulled me to one side to say that another teacher had asked Charlie what he wanted to do.  He asked if the ‘chocolate’ lady could read him another story. I WAS MORTIFIED.  I couldn’t apologise enough. Mrs Patel hadn’t told me out of disappointment.  She thought it was the most wonderful thing she had ever heard! This little three year old was just describing her as best he could and she was nothing but flattered that he enjoyed her reading to him. The Political Correctness that has been bashed into me over the years had almost convinced me that my little boy was showing racist traits at three years old! Right now, my kids see past skin colour, and I’m not going to change that Back to Obamas Tweet……..how cute is George and his fiend Si-si….. What are your thoughts? X

World Mental Health Day 

World Mental Health Day 

Today is World Mental Health Day and, although it feels there is a ‘day’ for just about everything now and Twitter is always trending with one or another, I think this is a really important one to talk about.  

We are all aware we are suppose to be taking care of our bodies.   We take time to go to the dentist, opticians, chiropodist, yet if we are stressed, feeling down or unable to cope we just soldier on.

I am researching children and teen mental health and well being for a post I am writing with The Childrens Society. I had never realised how many people suffer with mental health problems. I started to think about friends, family and people I know who have or could be suffering from mental health issues.

I thought back to a school friend who battled with his sexuality and felt so down that he tried to take his own life. I thought of a friend whos dad was so depressed he felt he had no way out, leaving my friend fatherless. I thought of a good friend of mine who suffered badly with PTS as a result of his time served in The Falklands. I thought of my nan and how I watched her deteriorate from Alzheimer’s. I thought of bloggers I know who suffer with such bad anxiety that they find it a near impossible to leave their house.

It was while thinking about different forms of mental health, from post traumatic stress to post natel depression, dementia to bi-polar to stress, depression and anxiety, that I realised I was overlooking my own experiences with mental health problems, albeit not as serious or obvious as some.

I think it would suprise alot of people to know I suffer with anxiety.

I know what you are thinking…. Thats no suprise with sic children.  But it started way before the kids came along.

It first started at Primary school.

I started  suffering with terrible shortness of breath. I always found it really hard to explain to my mum and dad, but it was like I was breathing in, but no air was getting into my lungs. Once it started, it felt like it would get worse and worse. It could last anywhere from a few minutes to days. I would have to sit outside the headmasters office with a brown paper bag and practice slow, deep breathing into it.

Mum took me to the doctor and I was tested for asthma but all the tests came back normal.

I never really talked about it again for years, I would just try to get through it by trying to take my mind off it.  Sometimes that worked and sometimes I would end up in a panic and crying. Then, towards the end of primary school I developed a twitch. My nose would screw quickly like Samantha  from bewitched…..only I wasnt casting a spell!

We put it down to my fringe being too long and tickling my nose, so I grew it out. But the twitch didnt go, so we put it down to habbit as a result of the twitch from my fringe.  It sounds crazy now but It never occured to me that it could be anything more.

So, here I was, going through my teens, suffering with shortness of breath and a nervous twitch (as we called it)…. I was a right sort 😉

The shortness of breath was never constant.  I could go months without suffering from it, then, out of the blue it would hit me. I would go into a panic and have practice my ‘mind over matter’ technique.

Things finally got to a point in 2009 when I went back to the doctors, desperate for help.

I was staying in France with the Mikey, Harri and Charlie (who was about 10 months).

Mike had gone to portugal with some friends and was going to fly from Faro to France to meet up with us.

The whole time I was in France on my own my shortness of breath was unbearable.  I couldnt concentrate on anything and I felt like I was in a constant state of panic.

As a young mum (25) all sorts of things went through my head. Maybe I have lung cancer….. What if its my heart…..

Once Mike arrived at the cottage to spend the rest of the holiday together the shortness of breath dissapeared and I felt ‘normal’ again. He would wind me up (and still does) that I just cant bare to be apart from him – trust me, thats not true!

With the fear it might return as badly as it had in France I booked an appointment with my Doctor.

I sat and explained everything to him.  I told him all about the asthma tests when I was a kid to the horrible feelings in France.

He said with no uncertainty ‘You are suffering with stress and anxiety’

I laughed it off and explained to him that I was not stressed! In fact, I was completely laid back and never got stressed, thats what I was known for! Laid back, easy going Kate- always smiling and never stressed.

Apparently I was the perfect candidate for anxiety.  He told me that because I am never outwardly stressed, my body deals with it in different ways. In my case, through shortness of breath, my rabbit-like twitch and small panic attacks.

I left his office feeling relieved but also confused.

I was relieved that i wasnt dying! But confused as to how I didn’t know myself that I had been suffering with anxiety all these years.

As time has gone on it has become more obvious to me. I can almost predict when the episode will start. Flights and holidays…..a month or so before I will start feeling jittery. My breathing gets deeper as my shortness of breath kicks in and Mike and friends will comment on my twitch getting worse. My close friends will even ask me whats on my mind as they will know from my twitch how high my anxiety is. Sometimes my twitch gets so bad it gives me a headache as my whole face contorts.

Big events, weddings, parties and nights out will start me off. My dad was very poorly a couple of years ago and that sent my anxiety to a whole new level.

The last two months have been a challange aswell.  Mike has been working away and we have been trying to choose a high school for the boys. In fact, writing this has made me very aware at how anxious I am feeling right now.

There is no cure or immidiate fix that I know of and I count my blessings that my anxiety is not as debilitating as some people. I have learned how to cope in my own way.  I still practice mind over matter, a little like meditation and sometimes i will try to busy myself with something else. If it is really bad I will run a bath with a few drops of lavender and ylang-ylang oil and soak for a while…. that usually calms me down a bit. Sometimes nothing works and I just have to ride it out.

So, mental health can come in all sorts of forms and you never know who might be suffering.  That is why tolerance and understanding is a great quality to practice. Mental health problems are certainly not something we can control or just ‘get over’.

Everyone who knows me will probably be suprised that I suffer with this,  It is not something I tend to talk openly about, maybe I should. I certainly do not feel crazy or ill, but I have learned to try and listen to my body and when it tells me to chill out I try to do just that.

And luckily Mike has always found my twitch cute thank god!

Thanks for reading guys…..that was as good as a therapy session!

I would love to hear your experiences with mental health and anything you can suggest to keep anxiety at bay.

Please share awareness for World Mental Health Day

Love ya

Kate

Xxxx

Choosing the right Secondary School

Choosing the right Secondary School

I thought about the boys future before they were even born. I looked into primary schools, high schools and nurseries. Obviously, if I was going to raise the next Prime Minister or Richard Branson I was going to have to make sure I made the right decisions with regards to their education. It seemed like it was forever before we would have to make any decisions, yet it has flown by in a blink, and a decade later, here we are.

Throughout the years though, I have realised the most important thing is that they are happy at school. If they are happy the rest should fall into place….right?

Well, that’s what I thought until this year.  With the boys finishing year five in a couple of weeks, and high school choices looming only a few months away, I feel like a huge weight is on my shoulders.

Time has caught up with me and I’m starting to face the reality that there might be more to choosing a secondary school than just making sure the boys are happy.

I was happy at school, too happy. I was happy messing with my friends. I was happy trying out my latest make up technique in science class. I was happy thinking about what lads name I would scribble over my homework book. I was happy planning how to get out of my next PE class. Happiness defiantly didn’t help me knuckle down and get the best GCSEs I could achieve.

I went to my local state secondary school.  It was a good school but like most schools you get out of it what you put in. The expectations never seemed particularly high.  That coupled with my lack of self disapline ment I was a typical ‘doing ok, but could do better’ kid.

Although my life has turned out better than I could have imagined, I know my school days were more of a social education rather than an academic one.

Seventeen years later and I struggle to even help the kids with their homework. I do my nine times table using the ‘finger trick’ and I was convinced my last son shared his name with a historical British King.  Turns out, apparently King Arthur was a legend?!

Please bear this in mind when you read my blog and notice spelling or grammar mistakes 🙈

However, let’s not knock the social skills and enjoyment you need to experience in your teenage years.

I do believe some of the qualities that helped me succeed in my career and help me run our businesses now were created at high school.

With a husband that attended a prestigious private school, we really do have experience at both ends of the British education system.

So this leaves me wondering about the twins. What school would suit them? The big difference between them and me and their dad is that they LOVE learning.

We have taken them to see the school that Mike went too. The building was beautiful and imposing, like Hogwarts, absolutely beautiful. The head masters office was a posh lounge, furnished  with a think cream carpet, a huge fireplace and a large chesterfield sofa. All of this was very impressive but when you are paying £20,000 per year I guess you wouldn’t expect anything less. The children were lovely, the facilities were not unlike the Olympic Park and the exam results spoke for themselves.

People say ‘if a child wants to learn, and they have the support at home they will do well anywhere’….do you agree?

We have looked at our closest local state school and I really liked it. The head mistress seemed strict but fair, she knew all the pupils (three thousand) by name and they seemed to like and respect her. The kids were polite and well presented and the facilities, although not to the standard of the private school, were Impressive.

Mike had a bit of an issue with the dining facilities.  The dining room could barely fit two hundred kids in it.  When he was at school everyone sat down together and ate a civilised lunch.  

I had to give him a lesson in state school lunch etticate. From what I remember, if we were eating in the canteen, it was usually sausage, chips, and beans which you inhaled as quickly as possible to give you time to gossip or flirt on the school field.

Mike wasn’t impressed by this! (Strange considering he became a scaffolder, who usually eat KFC with their feet up on the dash of the lorry!)

It has been quite an eye opener for both of us, learning about each others education.

We are going to look at all the schools again at the open evenings in September. I think, given we are fortunate enough to have great state schools in the area, we will choose one of them. Private school is a huge financial commitment and even if we could afford it, so many sacrifices would have to be made.

Narrowing down the state schools will be hard, they are all good.

All the Ofsted reports are great and when I’ve spoken to parents with kids already at the schools they all seem happy. Realistically there are two that we are in the catchment for. Mikey loves art and drama and Harrison is massivly into sport,  So those subject opportunities will play a big part.

The boys have to have a say aswell.  It’s important to us that they are happy with the choices we make.

Finally, practicality has to come into it.

With four children following them up the ranks I need to know it will be in a location that is practical for us, as a family.  

Not just for the kids, but for me (mum taxi) as well….not always easy when you live on a country lane with no pavement and at least a mile away from the nearest public transport.

My dad has even been researching for me.  I randomly got this text recently.  Anyone that knows my dad won’t find this that surprising 🤣


I asked a few fellow bloggers what they look for when choosing a school.  Here is what they suggest:

“Ask them how they are going to be saving money with the budget cuts. They all have to cut something. Their answers should help you work out if the school is well managed and planning ahead effectively.”

https://falcondalelife.com

“I’d look at whether the children are well behaved, happy and enjoying school. Also what extra curricular activities are on offer. The overall attitude of the school and whether they instill a love of learning in the children. Plus I must admit I’d be looking at results too”

http://www.familymakes.com

“Look at the standards in general: uniform, equipment, facilities… It would give you a good idea of the general atmosphere. Of course, look at the kids and try to feel if they are happy but look also at the teachers! Are they knackered and grumpy? It says a lot about the school Plus of course the Ofsted report! :)” http://thefrenchiemummy.com/top-tips-to-be-a-good-blogger/

“I spoke to parents with children already in secondary school. Are their kids enjoying being at school and doing well in their studies 🙂 Ofsted and open evenings are important too”

https://thedaisypages.com

I really struggled with this and ended up choosing a school where my daughter wouldn’t know a single person. ” https://www.frugalfamily.co.uk/hardest-decision-life/

“It’s not necessarily about secondary schools – more about any school (primary or secondary just the same) if you are choosing for a child that has additional needs”

http://www.rainbowsaretoobeautiful.com/2016/01/sen-choosing-mainstream-school.html

Do you have any tips that will help with our decision?

Lots of love,

A ‘trying to stay relaxed Kate

Baby Led Weaning

Baby Led Weaning

Baby led weaning…..lets talk about this for a moment. This is a new concept for me. All my children were fed straight from a bowl, to their mouths, on a spoon (or sometimes direct from a pouch) by me. When Charlie was younger he choked on everything.  Sometimes he brought it up himself, sometimes he needed a firm pat on the backand, and on one occasion our good friends, (who happen to be a doctor and nurse) had to hang him upside down to help bring up the offending food.  That period of parenting left me mentally scared. After that, Mike and I chopped up his food into the tiniest pieces until he was about seven!!! I had to logically tell myself that if he copes ok at school then I should leave him to get on with it himself at home, but even then I struggled. I carried this paranoia with me during Libby and Georges early years. Even now my heart stops when i see a toddler eating a banana, sausage or a whole grape. And now it is time to wean Arthur and I dont know what to do. Arthur is quite independent and likes to grab the food/spoon himself which can make feeding him a little frustrsting. Lets be honest, with an independent baby, a toddler and four older children, BLW is probably the more convenient and obvious option. I can’t tell you I agree or am doing it to avoid having fussy children or children prone to allergies. All of my five who were weaned ‘traditionally’ are far from fussy.  They eat anything from roast diner (even the brussels) to jamaican hot curries to oysters, cockles, olives and even liver! Food is a big part of our family. We socialise around food, We enjoy eating out, cooking and trying lots of different cuisines and I think that has had a bigger impact on their food choices than how they were weaned (but i am open to suggestion). We have a rule in our house…..you can not say you do not like something or do not want something unless you try it first. Back to BLW, From what I understand, you put a selection of food in front of them and let them feed themselves. I love the concept and it fits in with our family values of encouraging independence and choices. The Problem is my anxiety levels go through the roof at just the thought of it. So recently I compromised and I did let Arthur feed himself…..baby rice and pureed food. I popped Arthur in his highchair and let him loose with the rice and a spoon. Well, i put the spoon in his hand but that was swiftly given to the dog who was waiting patiently by his highchair, then he dived in hands first. The food was in his hair, over the highchair and even inbetween the plastic strap clickers (you know what I mean if you have ever had to clear the aftermath up!) After a mammoth cleaning session and a bath in the kitchen sink I decided to re think my strategy. I am going to try a mummy led dinner again tonight and see how that goes. But I would really like to try more BLW. Does anyone have any tips on what foods are good for babies to eat on their own wihout risking heart failure (mine that is). I feel like after having six babies you are expected to have all the answers, but things change so much and each baby is so different. HELP! I’ll update you with our progress over the next week. Wish me luck!

Supporting other parents

Supporting other parents

**WARNING – I have wrote this post with a ten month old on my lap and my two year old bouncing on my legs playing horsey so please excuse any typos, bad grammar or spelling mistakes!****** I have only just started enjoying our lunch dates with the kids again. As soon as George turned fifteen months my usual calm, civilized diners started to resemble a scene out of Jurassic Park. The one where the T-Rex is flipping cars and tearing down fences while the humans watch George flung himself out of the high chair (those wooden ones are beyond pointless!). He would chew food up and then let it spill out of his mouth onto the table while telling me ‘Don’t like it’. Instead of the pasta Arribiata infront of him, he would have his eyes on my moules mariniere (and happily eat every one!). The floor around his seat would have a mixture of food, snapped crayons and napkins scattered everywhere. It was so messy that I would leave the servers a 40% tip out of embarrassment and guilt. If I tried to discipline him at the table, he would scream louder and then would come the disapproving glances from around the restaurant. Considering I took my first four children out all the time, and we would be complimented on how well behaved they were…this was new territory for me. Add a new baby Arthur, who had a healthy set of lungs on him into the mix and eating out became nothing but an anxiety inducing stress-fest! Since November, thankfully things have changed. For a start, George has developed a love for YouTube (yep…and I WILL give him his tablet if It means I can drink my coffee while it is hot!) Also, now he can talk and communicate more his behaviour has taken a huge turn. I would even say eating out with him is enjoyable! The most important thing I learnt about my number five is that ‘No one puts baby in the corner. ‘ He is happier sitting in an adults seat with the older kids rather than a high chair next to mum! Last week we took the younger boys out to our local Italian for some lunch. It is one of our favourites because it is no only child friendly but seriously delicious too. It was a Friday lunchtime and the restaurant was full of mums with toddlers and older ladies and gents enjoying a retirement lunch. We were sat between a couple in their 70’s (I am guessing) and a lady with a baby having lunch with her parents. The baby next to us must have been about seven month and was crying…and crying…and crying. Her mum was trying desperatly to sooth her but the baby wasnt having it and the mum looked tired and stressed. Mike was trying to have a conversation with me but I couldn’t concentrate on what he was saying. I was so distracted. It wasn’t the baby that was bothering me…it was her mum. She was flustered and panicking and I could feel every inch of her uncomfort. I glanced around and realised the older couple had asked to be moved and the mothers with toddlers were rolling their eyes and tutting! I felt like crying for her! I walked over and knelt down to the mum with her baby. ‘Most the people in the room are parents and we have all been where you are. Don’t worry about anyone else, you are doing a great job.’ I offered to take the baby while she finished her lunch as ours hadnt arrived yet. She burst into tears and gave me a big hug. The mum felt instantly more relaxed and in turn, her little baby calmed down. George and Arthur were a joy that day and unlike the mum next to me, we were getting nods of approval. Usually I would feel proud that out kids good behaviour is being aknowledged, but when the praise is coming from the same judgemental dicks that are rolling their eyes at a crying baby I just felt annoyed. Rewind just a few weeks and it was me that was sitting their being talked about and feeling shamed. George didnt let us down though. As the bill was placed on the table he kicked his shoes off and ran through the restaurant. He ran around tables, giggling and screaming as I chased him like a overweight hurdler after a bottle of prosecco. As I passed the mums who had been rolling their eyes i laughed ‘It was all going so well! That will teach me for being smug!’ hoping they might find the hint and advice in my comment. George ran behind the bar, hi-fiving the waiters and I finally rugby tackled him at kitchen door! A couple of days after this I read in a paper that a lady with a crying baby was asked to leave a cafe because it was upsetting the customers. I wonder how many of those people offered some help or advice to the mum, who may well have been struggling herself, before they complained to the owner? Or whether the owner of the cafe thought to ask if there was anything he/she could do to help before they showed her to the pavement. I do have sympathy for everyone who wants to have a quiet meal without ‘naughty’ children or screaming babies around them. My point is simply, before you roll your eyes, ask to be moved or tut at the parents, take a second to think. Could this parent be struggling? Could that child throwing a tantrum have a disability that you can not see? Could this parent benifit from a gentle hand of reassurance? Or more to the point…..were your children always perfect? Anyway, im off out for lunch with all the kids….wish me luck 😜