Do kids see race?

Barack Obama tweeted recently

 

‘No one is born hating another person because of the color of his skin or his background or his religion……’

 

I am starting to wonder if, as well as pure ignorance, has political correctness contributed to Racism.

Obama is right, so at what age do you start noticing and worrying about racism?

My ten and eight year old sons were sitting in the back of the car with a friend of theirs who is mixed race.

Amongst the shouting and laughing coming from the back seat, I heard one of my sons say

‘you’re so black…..you….’

He couldn’t finish because I hit my brakes, pulled over and totally lost my head.  I started going into a rant about how I hadn’t brought him up to say things like that.

Before I could finish his friend stopped me.

‘Kate, we were just roasting each other! I just said to Harri, you’re so white, you must be invisible when its snows’

I laughed! and I was so relieved.

But It made me sit back and think,

Am I creating issues about colour that the kids don’t even see.

My kids aren’t racist, not even slightly, so why did I go so mad when I heard him say that?

Because, to make reference someone’s skin colour in a negative way is racist.  But,  Is it only racist if that person takes offence?

As their mum,  it’s my job to make sure they are brought knowing what is right and wrong.

I remember when Charlie was at nursery, he had the most wonderful teacher, Mrs Patel.  One day she pulled me to one side to say that another teacher had asked Charlie what he wanted to do.  He asked if the ‘chocolate’ lady could read him another story.

I WAS MORTIFIED.  I couldn’t apologise enough.

Mrs Patel hadn’t told me out of disappointment.  She thought it was the most wonderful thing she had ever heard! This little three year old was just describing her as best he could and she was nothing but flattered that he enjoyed her reading to him.

The Political Correctness that has been bashed into me over the years had almost convinced me that my little boy was showing racist traits at three years old!

Right now, my kids see past skin colour, and I’m not going to change that

Back to Obamas Tweet……..how cute is George and his fiend Si-si…..

 

What are your thoughts? X 

 

 

 

Our day at Godstone Farm

I have been visiting Godstone farm since I was Georges age.

Over the years it has just got better and better, whilst keeping hold of it orginal charm that makes me so nostalgic.

So last week, I made the brave decision to take ALL my children for a visit.

Even though we live on a farm, there is nothing like a day out at Godstone Farm.  We are so fortunate that it is just fifteen minutes from us.

Considering it was the middle of the summer holidays, it was relatively quiet, which helped me stay sane.

The farm is divided into areas that makes it easy to explore.

They have all the animals you would hope to see on a farm.  Horses, donkeys, pigs, goats, llama and cows. 

They have a wonderful selection of birds and smaller animals. Chickens, turkeys, geese and ducks, rabbits, ferrets and guinea pigs aswell as a few reptiles.

Activities are ran throughout the day such as animal talks and feedings.

Have you ever watched Pig and feret racing? 

The kids loved it!

I had to giggle when the boys announced, on seeing the piglets…

‘Look mum, this pig has more babies than you!’

-yep, she looks in better shape to!

Always a magical part of the day is the barn where you can hold the babies and small animals.  

They have baby chicks of different ages, rabbits and tortoises.

 Aswell as making sure no little darlings throw the chicks across the barn, Godstone farm employees are on hand to answer any questions the kids have.

My kids loved this area, particularly George.  

Lets talk about the outdoor play area that gets even the adult visitors excited.

The playground alone is worth the enterance fee.  

(How amazing is this swing!?)

It has everything from zip wires and large slides for the older kids (and adults), to a sand pit, climbing frames and ride-ons for the younger ones.

It is perfect to plot up and have a picnic, but, if like me you are not that organised, they have a sandwhich hut serving coffee, tea, cold drinks and ice cream.

We spent about two hours here, and I still had to drag the kids away kicking and screaming!

If the weather is bad, There are also two covered play areas.  

One is a huge soft play area set up in one of the large barns. 

The other area is smaller with a climbing area and slide, set up for younger children


After wearing George out in the play area we headed to the Dino Trail.

Dotted around a path, and looking over the llamas, at the bottom of the farm are large model dinosaurs.  Each one is accompanied with facts on the animal.

With a toddler and an eight year old obsessed with dinosaurs, this was a great suprise!

Who knew that a baby T-Rex could have been born with feathers?

We ended our day in the large sandpit for younger children with a portion of chips and an ice cream.

I spent most of my time here wrestling George as he tried to take every tractor toy in the sandpit away from the other tots. 

Always making time for a trip to the shop, the boys bought some water toys to play in the sun.

Apart from all the activities, I was impressed with the general appearence of the farm.

The landscaping is beautiful, the facilities were clean and there were plenty of hand washing points.

We had a great day at Godstone Farm.  As always, it provided a fun and educational day outdoors, enjoying the great British summer.

For more information, please visit

http://godstonefarm.co.uk/

*I recieved free tickets in return for this review.

However, as always, all my opinions are entirely honest and without biased.

Tips for friends of a newborn mum

Everyone loves a newborn.  Who can resist those tiny hands and that brand new smell.

It’s even more exciting when it’s a baby of a friend or family member.  

You can impose yourself as soon as the baby is born, then hand baby back when he starts crying…perfect!……if you want to piss off and send your friend into a stressy mess!

When i had the twins 10 years ago, i was clueless.

I was trying to take everything in. Learning to make bottles, change nappies, the art of winding, and all this while trying to bond with my new babies.

Aswell as the babies to care for, i still had a house to try and keep on top of.

When i arrived home from the hospital our first visitors were waiting on the sofa for us to get back.

It was flattering to know people care so much and were getting so excited over our babies but i found it quite overwhelming.

They told me to go and have a lay down and they would look after the babies.

At 24, and a new mum, i did as i was told.

Their intentions were great.  The realitly is, i wanted to be laying down with the babies.

The first couple of weeks visitors poured in with generous gifts and lots of love but if im honest, i hated it.

I heard alot of..

‘Dont worry about the babies, ill watch them, you get on with what you need to do’
Who wants to do housework after you have nurtured a pregnant belly for nine months and squeezed a human out if you?

What i really wanted was to chill out with my babies!
So…4 more babies later and a tonne more confidence, i’m going to tell you what works for me.
When you hear your friend has had their baby, these are my tips (because they wont tell you)
-Send your congratulations text and ask them to text you when THEY are ready for a visit.

No one knows what effect the birth has had on mum.   There is nothing worse than sitting on the sofa, scared to get up infront of your guest because you have leaked through your pad!

It took me a couple of weeks to even leave the house with the twins.  When George (number five) was born, i was out, digging into a tapas the next day!

-Take them round a diner, whether it is a M&S £10 meal deal or a homemade lasagne, it will be seriously appriciated!

-When you visit, after you have coo’d over the new bundle of gorgeousness, do a bit of housework.  

Make new mum a cuppa, load the dishwasher or offer to hang the washing out.

It will make her day! 
-Tell her how fab she looks after having a baby.  She will probably look like crap but its always nice to hear!

-If they are a new mum and breastfeeding, be sensitive.  Depending on your relationship and how close you are, it can be daunting….and embaressing.

The subtle breast latch, when you can start feeding your baby within seconds and with barely any boob showing is a talent that takes practice.

The first few days it is more of a undignified game of squashing your boob and nipple into all sorts of positions to try and encourage baby to ‘latch on’.

When you have an audience this can turn a already stressfull experience into a total meltdown.

If they look like they are not confident with feeding, either offer to help (if you know how to) or use that time to make a cuppa.

I asked some fellow bloggers if they had any tips, heres what they suggest:
Lisa at Mum and dad plus 4:

Don’t wake the baby if sleeping, don’t kiss baby, offer to make a brew and ask if they need help with anything pots, watching baby while they have a quick shower, making feeds feeding baby. Let them have a sleep if needed.  Go to help not be waited on. 

Http://Mumdadplus4.co.uk
Lisa at Baremother:

Do: bring cake or food (but check that mum isn’t lactose intolerant first), offer to hold baby so mum can shower, be the one to make tea/coffee, offer to help tidy or put a load of washing on. Don’t: touch baby without permission, kiss baby, overstay your welcome (an hour is plenty long enough), offer un-asked-for advice. 

www.baremother.com
Jen at Justanaveragejen:

Don’t insist on taking photos of the baby crying – my sons paternal grandmother did this and it broke my heart. She is not in his life anymore (not due to that) but it was weird and I am sure no one else would do it but you never know! And dont comment on how mum is feeding the baby, as long as the baby is being fed it isn’t your business! 

www.justaveragejen.com
Faye at Glossytots:

Take food and ask before you pick up baby 

www.glossytots.co.uk


Emily at emilyandindiana:

Make sure to focus on how mum is doing, just as much as the baby. And if they have any siblings, make sure to include them too, so they don’t feel left out! 

www.emilyandindiana.com


Natasha at itsatashathing:

Do take a little present for mum and baby. For mum some food and maybe some relaxing bath or shower stuff. Don’t tell her how to do stuff with the baby and sound patronising! Don’t pick the baby up without asking, especially if the baby is sleeping! 

www.itsatashathing.blogspot.co.uk/
Vikki at familytravelwithellie:

Thinking back to what I wanted from my visitors …. keep the visits short, never arrive unannounced, arrive with delicious selection of easy to cook food for new mum and dad to enjoy that night  ( m and s meals are a winner ) offer to help with any chores ( washing / dishes etc ) . Ask about mum and how she’s doing . Tell her she’s doing amazing. Tell her she has a beautiful baby . Tell her you won’t stay long this time but you would love to come back whenever she needs a little help , support, shower …. 

www.familytravelwithellie.com
Arabella at exeterbabyactivities:

Make a constructive but simple offer of help.  I see you are busy feeding baby,  – can I fold the washing for you?  Looks like baby needs a mummy cuddle, can I make a cup of tea for you?  Oh you are changing a nappy, shall I put the dishes away while you are doing that?

This lets mum and dad know you are thinking of them without offering any judgement on how they are coping.

www.exeterbabyactivities.co.uk
Emma at readyfreddiego:

I have a nine week old and although the offers of tidying etc were nice they made me feel a bit awkward so I would have loved someone  to send me off to have my hair done and make me feel a bit more me!

www.readyfreddiego.com
Abi at somethingaboutbaby:

I often hear people say to help new mums by doing some chores but I honestly wouldn’t feel comfortable with my friends doing that – especially in the early days, my husband was at home so he was managing all that.  I really just wanted to know that my friends were there for me, and interested in my new baby – that they wanted cuddles, and to take photos and feel involved in this little persons life.  I  also wanted that contact to continue – for them to continue checking up to make sure I was ok, and baby was ok.  As a new mum it meant the world to me that so many people cared about us. 

www.somethingaboutbaby.co.uk


Vivienne at themothersroom:

Bring a useful gift – healthy food, a lidded thermal mug, a voucher for a sling consultation so they can get to grips with babywearing, an Amazon voucher so she can load up her kindle for those multiple night feeds –  new outfits and teddies often go unused! Make hot drinks for everyone and if you do get a cuddle, don’t hog the baby!  

(As an aside, don’t invite anyone round in the first few weeks of motherhood if you wouldn’t be comfortable sitting with them in your pyjamas – if they aren’t that close, they aren’t close enough to intrude on such a special time)

www.themothersroom.co.uk
Claire at mumsymidwife:

Please do not bring your children if they have colds. I had this and my 12 day old daughter was admitted to hospital because of it. Do bring along something for Mum, as she is often forgotten. 

www.mumsymidwife.com

Terry-Ann at notaneffingfairytaleblog:

Make the visit a short one, call just before to make sure its still okay to visit as things can change so fast with tiredness etc and don’t ask to hold the baby – the mum might not want even her closes friends to hold it yet 

www.notaneffingfairytaleblog.com
Stacey at onesmallhuman:

Bring a treat for Mum. One of my friends brought me a vanilla latte from Costa (my favourite) and it was brilliant! It had felt like ages since I’d had anything like that. Add to that the fact I felt like I hadn’t slept in days and that sweet caffeine hit was just fantastic.
And the other thing? Once you’ve met baby and had your cuddles, ask about Mum! And have a conversation about something not baby related – office gossip, something on the telly. Remind Mum she’s still a human being! 

https://www.onesmallhuman.co.uk

Nikki at yorkshirewonders:

Take Just Eat vouchers!  I would have loved this when mine were born.  It’s nice to take them food, but I would rather just have a nice visit then a Dominos delivery afterwards! 

www.yorkshirewonders.co.uk

Chantel at twoheartsoneroof:

Great tips above, but don’t forget Dad!! I think Dad’s often get totally forgotten when it comes to new babies. Mums get all the attention and dad is often left feeling like a loose part. Ask him how he is doing too, and if your bringing coffee or something for mum get it for dad too! Baby will alter both of their lives majorly!! 

www.twoheartsoneroof.com

Jodie at maidenheadmum:

I took ‘Pub grub’ for my friend and her husband in their first week at home. I went and bought some premium burgers, posh cheese and the best chips I could find along with a beer for Dad and something tasty for mum as she was breastfeeding. I then cooked it for them so they felt like they were having a treat, even though they were still at home! 

www.maidenheadmum.co.uk

I’d love to hear what your experiences were.  Do you have any do’s or dont’s for visitors?

Please share this with your friends

Lots of love peps
Kate

Xxxx

A weekend in Liverpool

Another one of my best friends turned 40 this week and we celebrated by whisking her away on a suprise weekend to Liverpool. 


Rosie is from Ireland, and when her lovely sister (who still lives over there)  contacted me about doing something special I couldn’t have been more up for it. 

I cant take any of the credit for this weekend.   

I was pregnant while it was being organised and while my intention was to take on the organisation with Jennifer,  I let the side down. 

Luckily, Jenny did an amazing job,  dispite my total lack of cobtribution! 

I told Rosie that I was taking her away for a couple of nights, just me and her. 

I picked her up in an Uber (my first Uber experience, and it was amazing).  The cab dropped us to East Croydon where we jumped on the train to London Euston via Victoria.

I loved every minute of that train journey.   Watching her face, totally clueless and out of control.  

Rosie is the ‘ mum’ of our group,  always looking after us and making sure we are OK.   It was really strange seeing her reaction, having to rely completly on me (I’m not sure she enjoyed that part of the weekend! 😂) 

At every stop I would grab my bag and tell her ‘this is it ‘, I would watch her get up, get to the door and then tell her I was joking! 

She wasn’t impressed but I found it hilarious!  

Once we were at Euston I suggested we grab some breakie at All Bar One…little did she know…. 

Rosie was greeted by three more of our girlfriends, sitting there, ready with coffees and cocktails… shouting suprise!!!

Rosie was in tears, totally overwhelmed,  but it was amazing seeing her register just how much she is loved by us all. 
FYI All Bar One do some seriously yummy breakfasts! 

Over breakfast we gave her some clues to guess where we were taking her:

 

The biggest boy band ever were from there…… She had no idea 

There are lots of Irish people there…. Nope

It had an ‘e’ in it… Huh? 

Brookside was based there…. LIVERPOOL!!


We jumped on the train, opened a bottle of prosecco and had one of the best girls chats I’ve ever had. 

During that two hours we talked about everything from relationships, bladder control,  sex and laughed from start to finish. 

The poor fella sitting next to us was pre warned when he sat down that he was in for a special journey and if he embarrases easily he should probably think twice about sitting there.

I did offer him a drink to calm his nerves! 

When we got to Liverpool we headed straight to the hotel. 


#squadgoals

The Shankley Hotel was a great base for a girls weekend.  It is right in the middle of town.  A 5 minutes walk to the station and even less to the shops,  restaurants and bars.
The hotel is lovely,  decor is fabulous with glamour being at its heart and the rooms are great. 

The main room had six double beds in it and a kitchen area. 

I’m even thinking about going back with the kids as there are not many hotel rooms that can comfortably fit all of us in.

When we entered the room it was beautifully decorated (by the Irish girls who were hiding in the toilet).  They had left out champagne,  chocolates and strawberries. 

When Rosie walked into the room two of her sisters and her best friend from Ireland ran out of the bathroom! 

This triggered another flow of tears and a few ‘c u next Tuesdays’ muttered at us.

She was blown away,  she hasn’t made it home to see her family this year and I know she was missing them terribly.  
For them to fly over and organise this weekend was a perfect present. 

The package we booked worked out at £230 each for eight of us (that includes splitting Rosies costs between us).
That included the hotel, a cocktail making class, dinner on the Saturday night,  a choice of either make up or hair to be done and Afternoon Tea.

The train from Euston to Liverpool Line Street was £85 return.

On the Friday, after we had finished the introductions (this was the first time in 20 years that rosies London friends meet her Irish girls) we headed off for out cocktail making classat The Art House.

It was like going back to Playa de las Americas when I was 17,  downing dirty ouzo shots!

It was a real giggle though and the girl that took the class was lovely.  Also, nothing breaks the ice like slut dropping and making cocktails. 

From there we headed to Concert Square and enjoyed a few more drinks and  Shisha.

The next morning the sun was at full force and with the temperature soaring we were determined to enjoy brunch and an espresso martini by the water. 

We took a cab (£2.30!) to Albert Dock and had some coffee and cocktails at Panam.


We discovered during the weekend that Londons shopping experience had serious competition.   

Liverpool has all the shops you could possibly wish for,  all within an easy walk between eachother.
I would love to go back again just for a shopping weekend! 

While in John Lewis Katie had a Charlotte Tilbury make over which resulted in some yummy purchases.

We headed back to the hotel for about 5 to have our hair and make up done, ready for the night ahead. 

I opted to have my hair done.   I love doing my own make up and am very particular about how I have it.  Also, I am low maintainence with my hair so if someone else can glam it up then it is a no brainer!
Given the scorching weather we headed up to have a drink on the roof top bar before dinner (all at The Shankley Hotel).  Watching the half cut girls dancing in the sun kicked the night off perfectly!

Our first night was fun but fairly quiet given we were all mums, and away from the kids for the weekend. It was also quite ‘studenty’ at concert square. I’m not knocking that but we like a bit of sophistication in our older age (early night anyway) so we really wanted to find the area you could go to and have a cocktail made with proper spirits and not sugar and tequila!  😂 

I asked around during the day and it turned out our hotel was on the road  where all the best bars are! 

After our dinner at the hotel we headed to  The Alchemist Cocktail Bar on Brunswick Street.

The cocktails were out of this world and  the atmosphere was great but it was a bit of an arse-ache waiting around at the bar to order our next round.   That could be out fault for sinking each cocktail so quickly. 

We had cocktails there that bubbled, steamed and even ones that come with syringes of shots!

If you like Cocktails I would definatly recommend this bar. 

The night carried on in a bar down the road where we partied till the early hours.

The difference with partying in your 30’s is rather than passing out in bed with a full face of make up and glass of wine next to your bed, we got back,  made a coffee, took our make up off, and at 3am we were putting Philip Kingsley hair masks on! 

We kicked our last day off with a perfect post party breakfast at Barley and Beans.  I don’t know if it’s because we were so hungry but it was one of the best breakfasts I’ve ever had! 

I went for their granola bowl and bacon and eggs.  The other girls had full English and eggs beniddict.  As you can see from the picture, we had an amazing pile of Nutella pancakes for dessert 🍰 

After a some more shopping we went back to the hotel for Afternoon Tea and a de briefing of the weekend before we said our goodbyes and headed to the station for our train back home. 


I had a great weekend! 

After having Arthur I really needed a bit of child free time to myself. I’m home, refreshed and ready to tackle (literally) the kids. 

I met lovely new friends, caught up with old friends,  partied, relaxed,  shopped and laughed.   

I laughed so much and realised how lucky I am to have such wonderful girlfriends who I love with all my heart 😘




Rosies Coffee Lounge, Lingfield

Today I found what might be one of my favourite places as a mum of a toddler and a baby! 
I have to share this little gem with you because I have been waiting over 10 years to find somewhere like this!  

Rosies Coffee Lounge in Lingfield is every parents Haven.
The front of the shop is set out like a usual coffee lounge with a lovely vintage theme and on arrival you wouldn’t necessarily expect much more than a great breakfast and cup of tea. 

It is the back of the shop that left my speechless, I can only describe It like a mums ‘speak easy’ coffee shop. 

At the side of the coffee Lounge is a babygate that leads into a lovely ‘play room’ full of dressing up clothes and toy boxes. 

On the other side of this lovely room is a fantastic, covered, outdoor area with tables and chairs and a contained soft play area for babies and toddlers.
Perfect for a rainy day, you can sit and catch up with friends or just enjoy some time indulging a coffee and slice of cake while the little ones crack on and play. 

Rosies offers even more to us parents on a sunny day with a gorgeous outdoor garden. 
Completly covered in fake grass it feels a little like being in teletubby land.

They have ride on toys, benches, bouncy castle and lots more to keep the children entertained.
I honestly couldnt find fault in this wonderful place. 
The decor is quaint, cosy and vintage which makes chilling in their garden all the more relaxing. 
Baby gates and fencing everywhere means there is no way of children escaping which takes the anxiety out of enjoying your cuppa.
When i normally take George out for coffee with the girls i’m forever having to wrestle him into staying in a high chair, chasing him round like a lunatic before he starts stealing food from an unassuming diners plate or running out the front door. 

If I am lucky enough for him to sit still he is usually screaming like something out of the exorcist for a biscuit, that once I give him, he chews and spits back out 😣 
The toys, grass and equipment at Rosies are spotless which I am completly in awe of as I have never found a kids space that I am happy to walk around without my shoes on. 
If there was a coffee themed Masterchef, my friend Rosie and I would be the Greg and John and with our vast experience I can tell you Rosies Coffee Lounge capuchinno is one of the best we’ve had. 

The jackets potatoes and breakfasts were great too. 

On top of all this, the staff were so wonderful, welcoming and patient with the children (and parents) it made the whole atmosphere even more enjoyable. 
Rosies also offer children’s party packages and events.   Take a look at their website for more information. 

https://www.rosiescoffeelounge.com
I should add,  don’t be put off of you have no children.  As I mentioned earlier,  the font of the shop is a great area and when I was there,  not a child in sight! 
It’s important,  given my glowing review that you know I did not recieve anything in return for this review.   In fact, I went ‘secret shopper’ style and didn’t even mention Modern Mum to them. 
So, if you want to find me between the hours of 9-2 this is probably where I will be plotted up with Rosie, my laptop, a copy of OK or If I’m feeling like a particularly good mum,  I might even be playing with my children 😉
Let me know if you take a trip down there and what you think and tell them I said hi 🤗

Peace Out

Lisa is 40! 

Forty years ago today something pretty special happened.   My girl Lisa was born! 

We first met at work 15 years ago and it has been a friendship that I have been thankful for ever since. 

A career driven, strong, independent women who still manages to keep her femininity and maternal insticts at the forefront of her personality. 

She doesn’t suffer fools and you can guarentee you will get the honest truth whether it suits you or not, but if you ever need her she is there unconditionaly. 
God help you if you upset her friends or family, her comical wit and quick tongue will shoot you down in a heartbeat. 
When she announced her pregnancy six years ago and she told us she was planning to carry on working full time, I must admit I wandered if her career would have to take a back step.
Hell no, she juggles work and motherhood like a pro.  

Always giving her job 100% and making sure her family get all her attention when she is at home.   She even manages a pretty decent social life! 

She is a perfect example of a modern, working mum and I am so very proud to call her my friend. 
Always the more sensible of my girls I think it’s safe to say she keeps us all in check and in return we have opened her mind to the world of f#cks, Ann summers sambuca and low-cut tops 😘

So,  the year she turned 40 was always going to be a big deal.
We have a few celebrations in the diary over the next few weeks but today, we sacked off the local garden centre and kicked off the celebrations with a girls boozy breakfast at Aqua Shard.
I’ll review ourbreakie on another post.

Lisa, Happy birthday Chick.  I hope you enjoy every minute,  you deserve it.
Love you 💗💗💗
Kate  xxxx

10 things I love vs 10 things I hate about pregnancy  

I am linking up today with Parent Blogs Elite Linky #1 with Jenny at www.midwifeandlife.com

Because I have spent nearly four of the last ten years pregnant people assume I must love it.
It’s not so much about loving it as trying to embrace it and making the most of it.   It is after all a blessing.

Having said that,  like everyone I know all to well it’s good and bad points….

I have noted a few below:

LOVE 💗:
1) Obvs being able to eat tonnes of chocolate without feeling guilty and weighing myself 10 minutes later.

2) Not going out, You always have the perfect excuse to blow someone out! Yes I am saying that!  There are times when you are pregnant when no excuse is needed…. You just don’t fancy it!
3) No 2, same rules apply for the bedroom 😜
4) No hangovers, it’s rubbish watching other people get trollied without you but something empowering about being the only sober one, mentally noting all the Sh#t everyone is talking.
5) Those lovely little kicks that remind you something so special is happening inside you.

6) Planning for your new arrival, preparing the nursery, collecting and washing new baby clothes and enjoying the serene room you have created before your little bundle of pooping and crying joy arrives to cause carnage.
7) Not having to explain yourself if you decide to take an afternoon nap or go to bed at 5.30pm.  That NEVER happens to me with five children but you first time mums know what I’m talking about!

8) The waddle….come on,  this should go in ‘Hates’ but you can use it to your advantage.  If exaggerated just right you can pretty much get anyone to do anything you want.   eg, I might offer…

‘ would you like a cup of tea guy’s’

‘oh lovely,  thanks ‘

(cue me, struggling to get up out of my seat followed by a pro-waddle for a few steps, stop,take a deep breath……)

‘kate, sit back down hun,  I’ll do it ‘

‘are you sure,  I don’t mind ‘😜

…waddle back a bit quicker to my seat 😂

9) Playing the labour game with your other half and friends.

After about 35 weeks, every now and then, let out a quick loud ‘labour’ groan. Their faces are priceless!

Mike never fails to jump 5 foot in the air and scream ‘what,what, is this it!? ‘

😂😂…..

‘oh, no, false alarm  While you’re up babe could you do me a cuppa and a cheese and ham toastie, cheers ‘ 😉
10) The closeness it brings us as a family.   I love laying on the sofa with Libby’s head on my tummy,  the boys asking if the baby and I are OK and talking about all the exciting things that are going to happen over the next few weeks.

Hate: 😣

1) Putting on weight so quickly you forgot what you look like pre baby making.

2) Pregnancy brings a whole new meaning to

‘i don’t have anything to wear ‘.

Unless I want to spend £100’s on maternity clothes that make me look like pat butcher!

Jeggings, leggings,  baggy jumpers and t shirts is my wardrobe for 9 months.
My mother in law owns a lingerie shop and her first words to me as soon as we announce we are pregnant is ‘ your not wearing an underwire are u?’

Apparently that is really bad for a pregnant/nursing mum so she gives me a few really comfortable but totally unflattering maternity bras.

3) Mental hormones, last week I was in the car with mike and the kids when they said something that made me laugh.  My laugh turned from a Giggle to hysterical laughing to hysterical crying within 30 seconds.  It was so crazy the kids were getting scared and I couldn’t calm down to tell them not to worry.

Mike was looking at me like I was something from the exorcist which made me laugh and cry even more.

When we got home the kids Sent me to bed and told me ‘ you need some rest, you’re not normal ‘

4) Heartburn, it’s just constant and I drink more milk than my new born will at the moment.

5) Sleepless nights,  everyone associates sleep deprivation with a newborn but no one tells you about the 3 months of broken sleep you will get in your third trimester. If it’s not a full bladder it’s restless legs, aching back or vivid, nasty dreams.

Guarenteed, at least once in every pregnancy I have a dream Mike cheated on me.   They are so vivid I wake up, snarl and ignore him for the rest of the day!

6) piles – say no more

7) No botox or cosmetic procedures – I have aged 4 years in 6 months!

8) Lack of energy, as I lay here, writing this Its 9.07am, George is in bed with me but I should be up getting some washing and housework done.

9) Food…..no alcohol, no yummy cheese,  no pate, no shellfish, no liver, no runny eggs, no coffee, no sushi and ironically, guess what my cravings are!?  😠

10) That stage of pregnancy when you don’t look pregnant but there is no doubt you are packing a few more pounds….  Urgh!

Do you have any Loves or Hates of pregnancy to add? I would love to hear.


Midwife and Life

Happy New Years……Resolutions? 

​2016 has been an exciting year for me.   My new addition, George has given me his first giggles, crawled, taken his first steps and become a fully fledged toddler.

I watch my beautiful sister in law get married on one of the best holidays I’ve ever had.

I spent a fantastic weekend in Dublin with some of my favourite girls. 

I found out we are expecting baby number 6 and started my Modernmum blog.

I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone who has supported me and encouraged me throughout my blogging experience.😘

I have met some wonderful new people through this journey and still feel it is only just beginning.   

Looking forward to seeing you on the other side…2017! 🎊🎉

I was chilling in the bath earlier,   thinking about what my new years resolutions will be for 2017.
I’ve never made NY resolutions before (mainly because I know I’ll never keep them,  why add pressure!?) 
But this year, I feel like I want to challange myself,  to see if I am capable.   

So here it goes….   

-Being pregnant I’m not about to put pressure on myself to lose weight,  however,  baby is due in April.  By next Xmas I would like to be pre pregnancy weight. #goals

-Stop convincing myself Libby’s messy bun is an acceptable school hairstyle.   Actually start brushing and tieing it up neatly every morning. 

-Take George to more toddler groups and less coffee shops. 

-Start working at a desk rather than on the laptop infront of the TV.

-Always make sure the kids have lots of paper/supplies for homework projects.  They get so embarrassed taking in a scrappy bit of A4 when little jonny looks like Monet has done his homework. 

-With the children,  sign up to at least three charity fundraisers.

-No more dogs! 
-Always answer my mobile phone, even if I know it is cold callers, politely tell them to fuck off.

-Go out for more family walks,  such a cheap fun way to spend time together.  If we end up at the local pub… Even better!

-Stick with this blogging lark, I am really enjoying it and maybe even double my followers (feel free to share away😘)
-Get my arse into gear and make sure we have turkeys here in the summer.  Next Xmas we will be supplying your Xmas dinner) 
-Laugh more,  love more and try harder. 
So what’s your news years resolutions?  Or like me in the past,  do you just not bother? 
Happy New Year, Lots of Love
Kate xxxx

My Girls

​I was explaining to a couple of friends over a Baileys (don’t judge me) how I feel like I’ve lost my mojo a bit when it comes to my blog. 
I always love sitting down with a cuppa and boring you all with my life tales, but lately I just haven’t been able to motivate myself.
I have reviews I want to do,  subjects I want to write about but everytime I sit down I either fall asleep or end up catching up on Facebook gossip.
When I was telling the girls about this today they did what my friends do everytime,  pulled my head out of my arse,  cheered me up and motivated me.
 My friend Kate wrote a list of subjects on my phone she thought would be good to hear about.  


I was just going through them when I realised what I want to write about first is how special my friendships are and how they help me cope in life. 

This pregnancy had sent my hormones round the twist.   
I feel myself snapping and narking at anything and anyone. 


Last week I screamed at one of my really close friends in the bakery Isle at Aldi for taking the last tray of fairy cakes!
I found myself crying my eyes out when Band Aid played on the radio and then again when the heroine addict on Jeremy Kyle agreed to re hab!  
The other little treat I have found I have  with baby six is my honestly filter has disappeared.

If your lipstick looks shit you will probably get told,

If I need a Piss I will probably let you know 

If you are boring me, my eyes start rolling
You get the idea.
That being said,  my friends are amazing, they have put up with my bullshit hormones and even laughed at them. 


When I doubt my parenting skills they reassure me and don’t hold back correcting me if I need it. 
 

They understand when I don’t text straight back because I’m up to my elbows in baby shit and housework. 

They understand if I blow them out because after three sleepless nights with George I just want to curl up on the sofa.

They understand if I forget one of their birthdays because my brain is like a squashed melon. 
They understand when they come over and I haven’t got dressed properly. 

I have no bra on,  hair scraped up in a messy bun (and not one of those sexy messy buns) no make up and toothpaste down my top. 

I would like to raise a glass to friendship and my girls 😘
God know what I would do without them!
Right,  I’m off now to work on my blog 😉

 

Saint Nick popped in for a cuppa!

​Deck the halls!  
We have had a really special,  festive weekend full of friends,  wine,  mince pies, sausage rolls, tinsel, The Pogues and Santa Claus! 
Back in November I looked into which Santa to take the kids to visit.  
I looked into local garden centres, National trust venues and shopping centres.   

I know most of them are great experiences but when you have 5 children they are also really expensive. 
It got me thinking,  how much would it cost to bring the big guy to us!?

I hit Google and found a company called Hiresanta.  
They sent me a few videos of different Santa auditions and the relevant price for each Santa.

Obviously, the best,  most realistic was the most expensive….. And typically the one I set my heart on. 

The price tag for our Santa came at a wopping £300, but,  considering I was going to spend £100 for 2 minutes with a half decent Santa at the local garden centre, I thought I’d give it a go.

He didn’t disappoint!

The children were absolutely blown away (and so were the adults). 

Turns out our Santa was a professional actor with credits such as Eastenders, The Bill, Frost, Londons Burning and Casualty just to name a few.
He spent two hours talking to the children,  listening to each of their presie lists and told them a lovely Christmas story. 

We are definatly going to book again for next year. 
Some of the older kids were suspicious but he was pretty convincing and left even the most defiant believers wondering….. Could he be!? 

So I can confirm we are now officially in the Christmas spirit! 
If you can get a few friends together and split the cost it is a great experience and a chance to make special memories that last forever. 
It’s also a great excuse for the parents to get together with a few bottles of wine and let a jolly man in a suit entertain the children for a couple of hours. 

Only one problem, Santa left his belt on my bed!…. Try explaining that one too the kids 😆🙊🎅

HO HO HO!!!! 🎅
http://www.hiresanta.co.uk

New kitchen 

​The person who said the two most stressful things you can do in life is move house or get married never refurbished a house with four/five children! 
We finished our extension just before George was born but put our kitchen on hold. 

(this picture is totally irrelevant,  I just wanted to show off my wallpaper hanging skills !)  

I couldn’t handle the mess and inconvinience of no kitchen and a Newborn baby so we left it as it was. 

Now, nearly a year later we looking into finishing it and the thought is filling me with excitment and dread! 

I’m still cleaning dust up 11 months after the building work finished! 
This always helps :
‘There may not be a kitchen but don’t think for a second I’m living on sandwiches for a month.’
‘ let’s move into nana’s’
‘Can you still make Coco pops? ‘
‘ you should buy our old house. That kitchen was finished ‘
-Just some of the constructive comments my beautiful offspring offered!  
I also seem to be so much more indecisive since George was born. 

I’m no stranger to refurbing or putting new kitchens in but this time I’ve drawn a blank. 

I can’t decide what kitchen to go for, how to lay it out,  what floor to have, what lighting i want,  an island or a bar?  Solid wood or granite?  

This is so unlike me,  i am,  usually quite an impulsive and decisive person.

Either way,  what i want and what it will look like after a couple of months are two totally different things. 

I picture a sparkling white kitchen with a beautiful chandelier,  a huge bunch of flowers in a vase sitting proudly on the island,  a full wine Fridge and the smell of coffee in the air. 

What the ‘ real ‘ picture will show is dirt marks all over what used to be stunning white units,  dead lily’s where I have forgotton to change the water and can’t be arsed to empty the stinking flowers out,  an empty wine fridge (five kids and five dogs,  need i say more?) and the smell of shitty nappies because,  although I have the intention to buy nappy sacks each time I’m out, I never do!  #mumslife

I better start getting my arse into gear, two walls are being knocked down this week and the sooner I have a kitchen picked the sooner an end is in sight.
I’ll start tonight, hold on, Did someone say tapas? 

….

I’ll start tomorrow! 

Family Movie Nights 🎥

​Who doesn’t love Disney movies!? I could watch them day after day…… 

Oh, hold on,  that’s exactly what i have been doing for the last nine years! 
Given my babies ages (11 months. 5, 7 and two 9 year olds) I have been on the ‘disney, cebebeies, baby TV and Mr bloody Tumble’ channel for nearly a decade. 
So,  people may judge me when they hear i have been embracing the twins impending teenage years by introducing them to some of MY favourite movies. 
Some have been a hit, some haven’t, some appropriate, some maybe not,  but I’ve had a blast sharing my old favs with them. 
Pauly Shore is a bit of an unknown name in the UK, but growing up,  his movies were amongst some of my favourites. 

California Man, Bio-dome, son in law and In the Army Now are great movies for my boys.  They think he is one of the funniest people alive (besides Mr Bean). 

 
Stand by Me was our Friday night movie recently.   

It was a really lovely evening as Mike and I were as excited to sit down and watch it as they were. 


They found it quite emotional (when Gordie’s brother dies and when they tell stories about their family lives) but the ‘leech scene’ and all the swearing made up for it! 

FYI,  a little trivia I found out while writing this blog, did you know,  Vern in Stand by Me has grown into Jerry O’connell, who has been in Scream 2, Mistresses, Billions and Jerry Maguire! Who’d have guessed that! 


I don’t worry about them watching movies that use profanity anymore.    They know what they are allowed to say and what they aren’t and I trust their manners….

Plus, they probably hear worse at home anyway! 
Beetlejuice is now on their favourite list aswell as mine, along with Goonies, National Lampoons Vacation, Big, The Great Outdoors,  Overboard, The Ernest Movies,  Gremlins, Jaws, Mannequin, Parenthood, Return to Oz…I could go on. 
One choice that was very controversial in our house, and, I won’t lie, was Mikes choice for a movie night.  

His all time favourite movie,  FOREST GUMP!!!!
Now,  this movie is PG rated which was his argument for letting Mikey and Harri watch it. 

However,  I don’t think he took into account the various scenarios this movie involves. 

I found it the most painful 6 hours of my life (that is how long the movie goes on for isn’t it?  No? It f#@king felt like it!) 
Cringing at every scene i knew would be followed by an awkward question 

‘ mum why is Forest making funny noises after his teacher visits his mum ‘

‘urgh why is jenny making him touch her boob!?’

‘ why is jenny running away from her dad?’

But, the boys absolutely loved it,  Harrison asks me daily to watch it again. 

The adult themes went over their head but the emotional rollercoaster really swept them away. 

They are memorised with the whole movie,  Forest, his relationships with family and friends,  his comic manner, his constant need to please,  protect and love. 

I feel,  in hindsight,  it was a great movie choice for them that taught them things I certainly couldnt.
And it opened the door for me to test some other movies such as Olympus has Fallen,  London has fallen,  San Andreas, Outbreak 😱, Salt, Planet of the Apes.

So in short, now. When we have ‘a family movie night ‘ I can be in the room with them mentally aswell as physically, watching with general interest rather than staring blankly at the TV because I’m watching Toy Story, Frozen or Horrid ba#@ard Henry for the 1000th time! 
Don’t worry George…… I’ll still sit through all the crap for you 😘